Jill - the sister

Continue To Eat Healthy...

2010-06-24T18:05:00.005-05:00

This guy at work brings his home grown tomatoes to share and I got one. It's huge a round! I took a whole wheat English muffin, toasted it, added some low-cal mayo, and a thick slice of that home grown tomato!!!!! Holy canolies! It was so good, I wanted to slap someone!! Home grown 'maters are to die for!!

Here's some good stuff I got from WOMAN'S DAY for help with getting fit - I've paraphrased a bunch and added my own way of talking and thinking to it.

You've been dieting for a few months and have dropped some weight. You're feeling pretty good about your progress and then... something gets in the way that threatens to land you back where you started, and even heavier than before. You're not alone. There are countless dieters who assume they've mastered the art of healthy eating and then one day realize the number on the scale is sneaking up on them. Problems seem to fit into 5 categories. Here's what to watch for and how to get back on track in no time.

DIET DE-RAILER #1: YOU'RE BORED

In the beginning, dieting was kind of exciting. It was hard, but it was also an adventure - you get to think about food in a different way and try new recipes and meal plans. But once you've done all that, the excitement dies down and you figure out which foods fit into your plan and you've stuck with them. Then you get bored with the same old food, the same old recipes, and you usually give up.

TO STAY ON COURSE... EAT SEASONALLY.

Keep variety in your diet. Go to a farmer's market and experience fresh, in season fruits and veggies. Try something new besides apples and green beans.

ADD SPICE. The right spices can take an ordinary meal from boring to deeeelicious! Experiment with cilantro. I love cilantro in my Bush beans or in a salad! Try chili sauces and spices from different countries... experiment!

DAB ON CONDIMENTS. Add small amounts of higher-fat items. For example, add a little fat mayo to low-fat mayo to give it more flavor.

TRY BREAKFAST FOR DINNER AND VICE VERSA. Eat a veggie omelet for supper and munch on crunchy vegetables for breakfast. Breakfast food is not just for breakfast, ya know.

EXPERIMENT. Like, I used to think I would never, never, ever eat grilled fish. MY fish HAD to be FRIED! But I tried it one day when I was out lunching with Moke & Kasey. I actually tried and enjoyed eating grilled fish! It was kind of exciting and adventurous! I felt reckless and crazy... yeow well you wouldn't be laughing if you lived alone and found happiness in the little things, Mr. Smartypants.

Next Blog will be DIET DE-RAILER #2: YOU'RE A LITTLE TOO COMFORTABLE.

Oh, and I'll be weighing in the morning and will post my poundage... fingers crossed, good thoughts.

Continuing On....

2010-06-20T08:19:00.005-05:00

It's been 2 weeks since my last post. Haven't lost any more weight, but I haven't gained any either. I'm very proud of me. I've started to ride my exercise bike for 20 minutes 3 times a day, which is an unbelievable feat for me. Man, I've been very lazy! I've had a room set-up for exercise for the longest time, but I haven't been using it... now I am. Yea Jill! You go Jill!! Anyway, I keep my eyes open for little changes to make in my life that will help my journey to a more fit body. Here are some 400 calorie meals:

From McDonald's---> a cheese burger, a side salad with balsamic vinaigrette, and apple dippers.

From Subway---> 6" roast beef sandwich with pepper jack cheese and sliced apples.

From Wendy's ---> ultimate chicken grill sandwich and a mandarin orange cup.

Make it yourself ---> herbed cheese and tomato sandwich with an orange:

6 oz low fat cottage cheese

1 garlic clove, minced

2 TBS chopped fresh chives

dash salt and pepper

1 whole grain bagel

4 slices tomato

Place cottage cheese in blender and puree till smooth. Stir in garlic, chives, salt and pepper. Spread mixture on bagel and top with tomato slices. Eat with orange.

Every week, when you get off work on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, when you get home make it a priority to get on your exercise bike and ride for 20 minutes. Don't allow yourself to eat supper until you have done your exercise. You'll feel very proud of yourself, like I do!!

I will weigh again Friday morning, June 25th, and see how much weight I have lost!

Lost 10 lbs.

2010-06-07T16:45:00.004-05:00

I'm losing weight slowly, because they say if you lose it slowly then you're more apt to keep it off... we'll see. Anyway, I'm happy to report that I've lost 10 lbs. Thank you. Thank you very much.

It involves some of the steps mentioned 2 blogs ago, like making the right choices and stopping to think if you're really hungry or just craving and praying for help.

I saw the following snip-it on the Internet and thought it was interesting. I'll take some to test and not mess with the rest.

TOP 6 SKINNY FOODS FOR 2010 -- by Joy Bauer --

1. Pumpkin Pudding: Decadent, creamy pudding for less than 150 calories. Combine a 6-ounce container of nonfat vanilla yogurt with 1/2 cup canned 100% pure pumpkin puree and a dash of cinnamon. The pumpkin bulks up the yogurt--already a protein-rich, nutrient-packed food--and adds a hefty dose of fiber. This winning combo of protein and fiber expands in your stomach, keeping you full long after you finish, so you're not looking for more munchies an hour later.

2. Vegetable Soup: Studies have shown that just by starting a meal with a fiber-rich bowl of broth-based veggie soup, you can reduce your total calorie intake by 20%. That's because this "veggie first course" helps to fill you up, so you wind up eating less at the main meal.

3. Cucumber Tomato Salad: Thanks to their high percentage of water (95%!), cucumbers are low-calorie, high volume, and top-notch for weight loss! Slice up one whole cucumber plus a medium tomato, then toss with light vinaigrette or unlimited vinegar (balsamic or red wine is delish) plus 1 teaspoon olive oil. The entire salad has only 125 calories!

4. Ginger Green Tea: Nursing a warm mug of tea is a calorie-free way to destress after a long day without falling prey to emotional eating. As an added bonus, research suggests that regularly drinking green tea may give you a slight calorie burning advantage. Steep your tea with a thin slice of ginger root for an extra punch of flavor.

5. Friery Chicken Salad: Adding a few dashes of fiery hot sauce to your food slows down your eating big time so you're less likely to eat past the point of fullness. For a simple lunch, whip up a chicken salad with diced chicken breast, 1 tablespoon reduced fat mayo, hot sauce to taste, and any diced veggies on hand. Serve over a bed of lettuce (and have a glass of water handy!).

6. Shrimp Cocktail: At around 8 calories a piece, shrimp are a fabulous source of lean protein, which helps rev your metabolism and keeps you feeling full for hours. Next time you dine out, start your meal with a shrimp cocktail appetizer. When you're eating at home, dunk your shrimp in this could not be easier cocktail sauce recipe: simply combine 1 tablespoon ketchup with 1 teaspoon bottled horseradish.

2010-05-31T11:18:00.005-05:00

The following is from YOGA JOURNAL by Judith Lasater. I was pleased with what I read...

Isvara Pranidhana (Surrendering to God)

Patanjali defines "isvara" as "Lord," and the word "pranidhana" conveys the sense of "throwing down" or "giving up." Thus, isvara pranidhana can be translated as "giving up or surrendering the fruits of all our actions to God."

Many people are confused by this niyama, in part because yoga is seldom presented as a theistic philosophy even though Patanjali states in the 23rd verse of the Yoga Sutra that devotion to the Lord is one of the main avenues to enlightenment).

In fact, some yoga traditions have interpreted isvara pranidhana as requiring devotion to a particular deity or representation of God, while others have taken "isvara" to refer to a more abstract concept of the devine (much as Twelve Step programs allow participants to define "Higher Power" in their own way).

In either case, the essence of isvara pranidhana is acting as best we can, and then relinquishing all attachment to the outcome of our actions. Only by releasing our fears and hopes for the future can we really be in union with the present moment.

Paradoxically, this surrender requires tremendous strength. To surrender the fruits of our actions to God requires that we give up our egotistical illusion that we know best, and instead accept that the way life unfolds may be a part of a pattern too complex to understand. This surrender, however is anything but passive inactivity. Isvara pranidhana requires not just that we surrender, but also that we act.

Lost 9 lbs.

2010-05-29T13:23:00.009-05:00

After 58 years, I've found the secret to weight loss and keeping the weight off. With the help of my therapist, yes I said therapist, I learned to love myself and accept me for who I am. People have told me that so many times, but I didn't listen or catch onto it, had to hear it from a total stranger to grasp it. I am a very special, beautiful, fun loving, funny, joyful person and I deserve to be anything I want to be. I was beautiful as a baby, very beautiful as a child, a teenager, a young adult, middle aged, and now 58... I am beautiful, gorgeous in fact. I truly believe this, and I love myself without reservation, and know that I can be thinner and feel better, and am on my way to doing just that! It's not all about weight, it's about living your life to it's fullest and getting the most you can out of it, because we're just not here that long.

I love the words journey and adventure, don't you? The thing is, I'm not waiting for the journey or waiting for the adventure... I'm living the journey, the adventure. That's what I have to do, is to be present in my life and do the best I can for myself and those around me. Of course, I can't make the journey on my own, and I don't want to have an adventure by myself, so I have God with me at all times. I don't need another human being to complete me, I just need God. I talk to Him often and thank Him for my triumphs, plead with Him for help, and praise Him for his miracles. He helps in so many ways. Here's an example: I've got 4 hours of work left and I didn't bring any extra snacks, so I go out to the snack machine and find the lowest calorie thing I can - animal crackers. I go and get my 50 cents and when I return I put my $ in the machine, but find out I put $ in the soft drink machine instead of the snack machine. The money won't come out, so I see it as I need to get me a diet DP instead of the crackers. Get back to my desk with a drinking glass full of ice and some DP in it and realize I have grapes in the refrigerator!!! Wow, what a save by The Big Guy. If you ask for His help, He'll be there. With His help, I've lost 9 lbs.

During my journey, my adventure, I've got my eyes and ears opened to His direction. Not trying to be over religious, but He is my God and He helps me. Here are other things that I do, you've probably heard 'em all:

1. Eat with chopsticks when I can. It takes longer to eat and you end up taking food in slower and realize how full you are before you overload.
2. Think before you eat. Find out if you're really hungry before you eat.
3. Keep only "good" food around the house, fruits, veggies, popcorn. I just bought a hot air popper!
4. Drink lots of water. Water is my favorite drink!
5. Bring to work with you a drinking glass that you love to drink out of, fill it with ice and pour in Crystal Lite Peach Tea or a Diet DP or Diet Coke. It's a treat.
6. I'm going to take an exercise class, probably water aerobics. I have bad knees and a bad back and feel like exercising in the water will be best for me... besides, isn't that how old people exercise anyway. Ha!
7. As much as you possibly can, do NOT watch commercials. They lure me in and make me crave everything!
8. Do your own cooking. Leave fast food for reward days.
9. Set aside a day of the week to eat what you really are craving. I can't do without pizza or hamburgers or Mexican food forever, so I save special days to have these kinds of foods. In the meantime, I cook them myself, but with fewer calories - it's really the best way, and after awhile you grow to like the less calorie foods.

Those are just 9 ways that I live my days, will post more later. You'll be hearing of my success and of the miracles that occur.

Why????

2010-05-08T21:03:00.005-05:00

I was just wondering...

...Why racing bikes have those horribly, thin, uncomfortable seats on them? If you're going to get outside and exercise on a bike and ride long distances and pedal like a pusher, why would you want to torture yourself while doing it?

...Why do some people ride on other people's bumpers? They're not going to get where they're going any faster by doing this. Be patient, and when you can pass the slower person, do so, but no finger jestures, they're really not necessary, I get it.

...Why is it when you go garage saleing in Clear Lake, that the people there follow you around and watch you like a hawk, like you might steal something? I know there are those who do steal, there is evil in this world; but dude, did you really think I was going to stuff your old rusted bait bucket in my purse? Come on!

...Why is it that people who live in beach houses in Clear Lake act like they're better than those of us who don't own beach houses? I know they're better, but they don't have to act like it, riding around hither and yond in their golf buggies. I could own a golf buggy if I wanted one... I can save for anything I want... just don't happen to want a golf buggy... very much.

...Why, if a person from Clear Lake is going to have a garage sale, do you NOT put prices on things? If there is no price on your items, then I don't want your items. That would be like going to a restaurant, looking at the menu, and seeing no prices... I'm outta there... 2 tacos and a 5-layer burrito for me! I'm a cheap date.

...Why are all the Schlotskys sandwich places, closing down?! The one on Spencer and Burke is now a Verizon store! The closest one to me is now the Schlotskys on Bay Area Blvd. What is going on?! It's like when the Taco Buenos disappeared around here. I mean, I love Taco Bell, but I also loved Taco Bueno, plus Taco B had a beef burger to die for! No one has that anymore. Please if you know where I might purchase just the bread that they make Schlotskys sandwiches from, I will buy you a sandwich... seriously.

...Why would a guy who drives a golf buggy around his neighborhood in Clear Lake with his 3 grandkids sitting with him, be drinking a beer at 9:30am? #1 He's driving = bad; #2 He's driving children = very bad; #3 He's drinking at 9:30am = people, we must draw the line somewhere!! The only good thing about it... probably around 3pm I could buy his house from him and he wouldn't care.

Jill's Journal - Entry 2: To Kansas I go for the 6th Time

2010-05-02T08:48:00.010-05:00

13 days and I will be in Holcomb, KS! Going to see my youngest son Ethan, daughter-in-law Deni, and my beautiful, genius, talented, funny little Grandsons Faolan and Rowan! I call them My 4 Moochies. May 17 is Rowan's birthday and November 17 is Faolan's birthday, so I make the trip to Kansas twice a year for their birthdays, and that is every 6 months - in May and in November. I usually stay 5 or 6 days.

My adorable Grandsons call me Gamma, I love that name. I made it up because it's like I have extra powers like in the Gamma rays The Hulk has. I'm mean like The Hulk, and if I continue this same course, I'll be as big as The Hulk in no time. Don't know what to do about being green. But I sure am Gamma.

Anyway, while I'm there... I sit and watch them watch TV, every once in awhile Faolan will say somthing like, "Gamma, you're looking at me." I also play with them as much as I can, working through the knee, foot and back pain... usually sit on the floor, makes it easier on the pain and we surround ourselves with toys. We also go to the Richardson Zoo in Garden City, and I watch Faolan and Deni climb The Rocket. The Rocket is on the playground there and people climb to the top of it. The Rocket even has a profile on Facebook... I kid you not! It's not real tall, I plan on climbing it this year. I am an actual friend of The Rock! Cool!!

And we'll go to "Story Time" at the Library, and I'll get to watch the boys faces light up while listening to some sweet person read a book to them and other kids. You know, I think I'd like to do that. I can do voices and a British accent that Big Al absolutely hates me to do but I love doing it. Wow, that would be a bunch of fun to read stories to kids. Wish I could make a living at that, or add to my income by doing it - very cool. I wonder if they even pay the person who reads to the kids, it's probably a volunteer thing, that might be fun anyway.

We ALWAYS go to the Thai Restaurant! It's excellent food, very hot! My Moochies are beyond regulars there, they are totally into Thai food. I don't know of a decent Thai Restaurant around here, wish I did. I always get the chicken with veggies, extremely spicey - Moke couldn't take the heat, he's not good with spicy hot flavors, he's such a weenee. And you get a big glob of steamed rice with it.

Let's see what else are we going to do, oh yes, we'll go to Sondra and Robert's (that's Deni's Mom and step-dad) house and have a BBQ in their backyard. This is always fun and we have a good visit with them. They're putting their trailer in E&D's yard and hooking it up so that I can stay there during my visit. The reason for that is that E&D have some exotic animals that I'm totally unfond of and don't want to sleep in the same room with. For instance... cats, 2 rats, and a bearded dragon! Oh such joy for me!! But staying in the trailer is going to be a dream, and an awfully sweet and loving gesture from my dear friend Sondra.

Another thing we'll be doing is to go to Walmart, probably 2 or 3 times during my visit. I hate Walmart, especially hate the Walmart in Garden City. The diversity of this town is... well it's diverse... very much so. You have many, many Mexican Americans, lots of white people, some Ammenites, and a few blacks. On rare occasions I will get a return smile, which truly makes my day! But for the most part, these groups keep to their own kind and give the other kind hateful looks. It can get scary, but the best thing to do is just to pretend that we're all a like and that no one is better than anybody else, and remember to smile... smile you're ars off, and you'll pretty much be okay.

Yelp, 13 days and I'll see My 4 Moochies - Gamma is beyond excited!!!!!

Jill's Journal - Entry 1: My Forgetfulness

2010-04-25T12:33:00.005-05:00

[Pictured: Daddy, Ma, Lynda, Larry, Susan Dennis, Mark, Jill, Alan]

Yesterday was my birthday, I turned 58 years old. Like I've mentioned before, my mind and soul are more like 10 years old, but the 'o body is way up there in age! Had my birthday party at Moke & Kasey's yesterday. We have one monthly gathering at different homes and celebrate any BD's or anniversaries of everyone in the Family. Yesterday turned out to be one of our best gatherings.

M&K had BBQ, potato salad, cole slaw, baked beans, chocolate cake! They did a bang up job with everything! And the weather was so beautiful, we sat outside most of the time. Everyone kept saying isn't this a perfect day?!

It's so much fun watching the big nephews play ball and the littler nephews and nieces just playing. There was 20 of us. We ate and talked and laughed and played and... I forgot stuff, well something huge, actually. Here goes:

Those present, my niece Debra, her husband Rob, my sisters-in-law Betty and Dardon Annie, and my little brother Alan. They were very sweet, each one of them. But I must have beat myself up black and blue inside for what I did, cause I feel very sore inside today.

We're sitting there having that beautiful BD meal. I've always wanted to converse more with Deb, my precious niece, and her husband Rob, just to let them know that I care about them and am interested in their lives. First off, I ask Rob what do you do at Nasa, he tells us. It's cool what he does and I'm proud of him, and I listened really well. Second off, I asked Deb what she did at Nasa, and she told us. It's cool what she does and I'm proud of her, and I listened really well.

Okay... oh let's say maybe 5 minutes after that conversation, I turned to Deb and asked her, "Now... tell us what you do at Nasa."

My sweet niece looked at me just slightly puzzled, and then a full-blown memory came blasting back into my head, and then came the OMGosh I just asked her that! And I thought, what the heck?! Then there was panic and humiliation and terrible, negative things I whispered to myself about how stupid I was and how could I make a mistake like that, and then came the shock of it all and of course the stupid tears! I've forgotten things before, but I knew this was a very major memory mistake! Frightening, it was [Yoda, of course.]!!

Those Family members I mentioned who were present for my massive forgetfulness could not have been kinder nor more sympathetic to me, and they said they had done the same thing themselves... many times, and Jill don't worry about it, it's okay no big deal. But it was certainly a big deal to me. I couldn't believe it, just could NOT believe it!!

When I got home from Conroe, I was taking my gifts out of the bags and came upon a BD card from Alan. He does that a bunch, he'll give ya something or do something and not tell ya about it, then you just happen upon it. The BD card had a fresh banana on it and underneath it was the word "yesterday". Then there was a picture of a more ripe banana and the word "today" underneath it. Opened the card, it said, "Being one day older only matters if you're a banana." Happy Birthday! Love ya, Alan & Marlena. Ha! I thought that was very fitting.

In order to get through it, I chose to believe them saying they forget things all the time too, and much later, I chose to forgive myself. Those older in our Family worry about Alzheimer's with a capital "A", because our beautiful, oldest sister Lynda had it and passed away on October 4, 1995. She had it for a very long time, we miss her and it was so difficult to see her the way she was. I wonder if I have it now and this is the beginning of my very slow trip down to the end. I don't mind the end, I'm ready to go to heaven, it's the "down trip" that bothers me.

I feel much better now, it was one of those things that happens, ya know? I wanted to read to you the birthday cards my brothers and sisters sent/gave me. I believe God helped me by using these cards to make me feel better and not so lost....

From my sister Susan Jane, the card said: "Sister, May you greet the coming year with dreams in your heart and a smile on your face. May only good things come your way. May you have many moments that fill your days with happiness, and may you live the one, exceptional life only you were born to live." -- Sue wrote, Hope your day is filled with fun. Ask the brothers to give you a huge hug for me.

From my brother Larry and Betty, the card said: "Sister, Joy, Peace, Love... Joy for your spirit. Peace for your soul. Love for your heart. On your birthday and everyday, may these be your gifts." -- We love you, Larry & Betty.

From Moke & Kasey, the card has a brother holding tight to his little sisters hands and swinging her around, the card said: "Hold onto the wonder all around you... You'll never grow old. HAPPY BIRTHDAY." -- Get it? "Hold onto the 'wonder' & we'll never grow old." I wonder who said that? See, I feel younger already. Life would sure be a drag without our kid sister. Our prayer is that this year in your life will be the best one ever, and that we get to enjoy it with you. Love you, Sis... Moke & Kasey.

Now after that, how could I feel lost, how could I worry. We're told not to worry, ya know. I just feel loved and cared about, and I hope I do the same for everyone I love and especially to those that I don't.

--Thanks for reading my 1st Journal Page.--

I feel very old

2010-04-16T22:07:00.006-05:00

I'm young at heart... playful, silly, I laugh a bunch, especially since I'm taking yet another drug. Been thinking maybe the right combination is finally in place.

I'm also very fun-loving, but, my body is aged somewhere around... well... way older. I hate being old! When you're old you can hardly move, and your body makes creaky noises and you moan a bunch. Every time I get out of bed or out of a chair, my movements must be planned and clearly thought out; otherwise, I could easily dislocate something or something could fall off! It's so tough being old.

I work with a guy, Bill Miller is his name. We graduated together in 1970 from good 'o Pasadena High School. We were young then, now a days, we both limp around like we're as old as the hills... which I reckon we are. We'll be 58 this year. Sheesh! OMGoodness, I just realized that he & I are only 2 years away from being in the 60 numbers... 61, 62, 63... and then, in no time we'll be in the 70 numbers!! Our lives are almost through! Where did the time go??? There's so many things I wanted to do before I died!

Like jump from an airplane! Now that's never gonna happen, because when I landed, I'd crack something for sure even while wearing a parachute. And there will be no bungee jumping because I would probably scramble the vertebra in my spine! No marathon could I run or even walk. And bike riding is out of the question because of my back and bad knees. Skating, forget that too... much breakage would occur indeed.

I was watching poor old Bill Miller walk today and he kind of moves from side-to-side when he limps. Me, I'm more of a slumped forward limper. My limp is nowhere as bad as his, thank the Lord. But, if I stand for too long or walk for too long, my herniated disk yells at me to sit the heck down!!

I really do feel so old... I was on Facebook and doing one of the many quizzes they have, and one of the questions asked what year were you born. Well darn it all, turned out I'm so old they didn't even post a year back that far!!! I was saddened.

Oooooooh, I'm old, so very old, and I don't like it one bit. Did you hear that creaking?

Young at Heart

Things Your Hairstylist Won't Tell You

2010-03-26T16:09:00.007-05:00

Maureen Mackey interviewed some hairstylists. The following are things they will not tell you:

1. I'm a beautician, not a magician. I can give you a movie star's haircut, but I can't give you her face.

2. Come at least five minutes early. If you're running late, please call ahead. Show me some basic respect. This is a business, not fun and games.

3. Don't ask me to "squeeze" you in. I'd be taking time and effort away from other clients. You wouldn't like being treated that way.

4. If you're looking for a therapist, all I have is a tail comb and an option. Hairdresser school does not teach about counter transference, projection, negative reinforcement, or personality disorders.

5. A trim is not "just" a trim. It requires my expertise, skill, knowledge, and time. Would you say to your dentist, "It's just a tooth", or to your doctor, "It's just a leg"?

6. I most likely won't remember how I cut your hair. Some clients will say, "Cut my hair just like you did last time." That always baffles me. The average time between appointments is six to eight weeks. I have hundreds of clients. How am I supposed to remember exactly how I did your hair the last time?

7. Why do you think a child's haircut should cost less than yours? Kids don't sit still. Kids kick. It's an intense experience.

8. Standing all day and using scissors and blow-dryer takes its toll. I have arthritis in my fingers, calcium deposits in my wrist, and 10 percent less hearing than I used to. I am a physical wreck!

Oh my word, I had no idea!!

Just reading this pisses me off and

makes my hands and feet hurt!!

__________________________________

FACEBOOK

2010-03-14T23:12:00.007-05:00

The only reason I started on Facebook was to see what's up with My 4 Moochies, meaning my son Ethan, his wife Deni, and of course my beautiful Grandsons, Faolan and Rowan. I get to see pictures that Deni posts of the boys and I get to see what's going on in their lives. I only get to see My Moochies when I drive to Holcomb, Kansas twice a year, once around May 17 (Rowan's birthday) and then again around November 17 (Faolan's birthday). The boys are growing up so fast and I'm missing so much, but I try to stay plugged in by being on Facebook.

I found out that Deni dreaded her hair, she loves it that way and feels more like herself with dreads. She'd look beautiful bald headed as far as I'm concerned. Faolan is taking karate. And Rowan can flip his Daddy over when he doesn't get off the slide at Chuck E Cheese.

Since I've been on FB, I've found some friends, some new ones and some old ones and a bunch of family ones. I don't comment to probably 95% of my friends and they don't comment to me, but I just thought I needed more friends, so I invited them, and now there's more people that I don't comment to.

Seems a bunch of my friends are into finding gold and losing poor little animals and farming virtual farm land. I tried the farmland thing, but just couldn't stay with it. I would rather play Text Twist and make as many words out of 6 letters as I can while being timed.

But, truly what thrills me the most about FB is getting a response from my Ethan or Deni, it doesn't happen much, but I'm sure happy when it does. Makes it feel like stupid Kansas isn't that far from me.

On FB, I do take quizzes to find out what movie star I am or what element I'm most like, what character I would be in Lord of the Rings, what flower, and on like that. I find those kind of intersting find outs. Most of the time, I turn out to be the thing or person I figure I would be most like. For example in Lord of the Rings, I'd be a hobbit. In flowers, I'm a daisy and that's perfect cause that's my favorite flower. Took a what should be your occupation quiz, turned out to be an actor. I'd have bunches of fun doing that.

And you can say on FB just about anything that's on your mind, like I'm depressed today, or I'm going to do this or that today, or wish me luck on blah blah blah. And people sometimes respond with their well wishes and atta girls. It's kind of cool. It's strange, but probably my most favorite person on FB outside of my 4 Moochies, is my ex-husband's wife. Weird huh? Well Tracy is a sweetheart, and I like her and see makes nice, supportive comments, and I like that.

I came upon this picture of the cutest little beagle I've ever seen. Look how guilty he looks, wonder what he did?

But isn't he adorable?

_______________________________

Jill's Brother

2010-02-28T17:38:00.004-06:00

This is Jill again. Ida's still not well. She said she may have to give up her blog, because it's all she can do to keep up with her radio program and the special requests she receives from all her fans, plus her not feeling well. I told her I wouldn't mind taking over her blog and filling in at any time, even though I don't know how to write and don't have much to say. Ida told me to keep writing for her and that I was doing a fine job... I know she's just saying that to make me feel good.

The last blog I did was entitled "What's on Jill's mind", and apparently Moke is the only one who cared enough to find out, at least he's the only one who posted a comment. LOL! He's a good brother... he and Kasey are The Best Jerry, The Best!! They've done so much for me by letting me hang out with 'em, giving me support, and listening to all the weird stuff I talk about.

I just left their house after spending the weekend with them, and Moke said, "Jill, I laugh more with you than I do with anyone else." Wow, what a compliment. It's true what he said, we laugh and laugh. It's so much fun spending time with the two of 'em.

Did you know that Moke and Kasey are fine cooks! It's true. They fix a great grilled steak, an excellent BBQ brisket with cole slaw and beans, yummy soups, and delicious cornish hen. Oh! And when they're not cooking for me, we go to the best places in the World to eat, like McKenzie's BBQ and Taco Bueno!! Oh Momma!

When I go to visit them, they don't mind if I take a nap during the afternoon, isn't that the sweetest thing? We go to the movies and sometimes do some shopping, watch rented movies or just watch TV. And, Moke & Big Al let me act in their videos when there's a part for me. And Moke and I talk and talk and laugh and laugh! I consider him my best friend.

The reason I visited 'em this weekend is because I was supposed to do some acting with them in Cut and Shoot at a flea market, but I decided that after we went to church and I walked around a little bit, that my knee was not going to hold up very well with too much walking, and my lower back was giving me fits too. So I missed out on the acting bit, I was pretty sad about that, cause acting is lots of fun, especially with my brothers.

I'll be going up again next weekend to Moke & Kasey's Bed & Breakfast (cute, huh?). I have 2 reasons for going. The first is that Don Piper, the writer of "90 Minutes in Heaven", is going to be at The Ark Sunday morning. I've read his book and I've also listened to it on CD, what a remarkable man. I'm not missing out on a chance to see him and hear him talk, no way! I'm very excited about it. Would love to shake his hand and maybe put a little money in his pocket. Moke told me the guy doesn't ask to be paid for his preaching at other churches, just his expenses for traveling and staying over night.

The other reason I'll be going again to Conroe is because of our March Family Gathering. My nephew Nalin and his wife Kristy are hosting it. We have a good time at their home... they have a Wii. I won't be able to play with it though. I've gotta take care of my knee and back and make sure I don't hurt them any more. Forgot to mention that I had knee surgery and was feeling right as rain, but then I wasn't being careful and when I went to turn, my torso moved but my left leg didn't and I wrenched my knee! It hurts like the dickens! I'm doing physical therapy and am sure that it will be super duper some day.

Well, I guess that's enough of my rambling. I had a very nice weekend with M&K and I'm very thankful that God let Moke be my brother. He's a pickle. I just love pickles.

____________________________________

What's on Jill's mind

2010-02-20T22:51:00.010-06:00

Hi everyone! It's me, Jill. I'm Mark and Al's sister (Please don't count that against me.). I can't believe that Ida let me fill in for her for awhile, especially since I don't know anything about doing this. I'm definitely not a writer that is for sure!

The cool think about this though is that I'm not expected to be "a writer" or "a columnist", cause I'm not. I can just put down on here whatever comes to my mind, and it doesn't have to be worded correctly or elaborately, just my words typed here on Ida's blog right here, soooo ah, I'm just gonna think of stuff and then gonna put it on here... Ah... well, let's see...

Okay... I don't like the Kardashians. There's a good place to start. I don't know who they are or where they come from, except that they're rich and pretty people, and somewhere in the family is the swimmer guy who got the nose job that looks absolutely terrible!! Hey that felt good to get off my chest! Let's see what else I can think of...

Have you ever eaten a whole wheat tortilla? Well don't. They're horrible! Of course someone's going to lose weight by eating them, cause they're unedible! Hey, this is fun!

"How I Met Your Mother" is a sucky show! I don't even know who the mother is? And they start some of the shows off with these 2 kids having to sit and listen to their dad talk about meeting their mother, only he doesn't talk about meeting her, he just talks about what he and his friends do or did. It's definitely no "Friends" I can tell you that much. It's just real sucky.

Oh man, I rented the movie "Push". Holy cow, don't waste your money, it's terrible, beyond terrible in fact. I couldn't watch the entire thing, it was just too stupid and terrible to sit through. I just saved you a few cents.

My family knows it, but you guys might not, I'm crazy about my grandsons Faolan and Rowan. they are the most beautiful little boys to ever live. Here's a picture of my son Ethan with Rowan. Ethan is an RN and Rowan is helping Daddy with his homework. Isn't this the sweetest, oh I know adorable in everyway, what did I tell ya?

Hey, this was fun! I truly enjoyed it. I don't know how much longer Ida will be feeling bad, I'll be sure to keep you up on her progress. I brought her some chicken soup today and she was loving every bit out of it. She said to say hi to all of her faithful and devoted readers out there. Am pretty sure she was talking to you Ms A.

Welp, till the next time, keep the wind at your back and don't roller skate in a buffalo herd... you can't do it.

______________________________________

Until I feel better...

2010-02-19T16:54:00.002-06:00

Rooftoppers, I haven't been feelin' too well of late, so I asked someone to fill in for me on my blog page for a bit. She's that sister of Mark and Al Hayter. I don't know what she's gonna come up with or has to say, but she said she'd keep it clean.

She even offered to accept any get well cards that y'all might have to send me - you can mail them to her house and she'll bring 'em by for me. Thank you in advance for all the cards!

Jill Hayter Jakob

1803 Elmwood

La Porte, TX 77571

I really do appreciate this Jill. Do you think that the next time you drop by you could straighten the place up a bit, and pick me up some of that Crystal Lite Peach Tea that I like so much? Thanks darlin', as your brother Mark would say, "You're a peach."

_________________________________

Jokes

2010-02-11T15:18:00.008-06:00

I don't know about the rest of you Rooftoppers, but I love this cold weather... do believe I mentioned that before. Everybody's been fussin' and fussin' about the cold! Think people! Just think about it! In no time at all, it'll feel like 120 degrees out and like it's never gonna cool off! I think everybody forgets the sweatin' we do here durin' most of the year. I say, "Mr. Winter, you just stick around for as long as you'd like as far as I'm concerned."

A good friend of mine, Paul Gordy, I call 'im Paully, sent me the following jokes that you might find a little bit humorous. My favoirte is the last one.

How many men does it take to open a beer?

None. It should be opened when she brings it.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?

It allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

When she starts a sentence with, "A man once told me..."

How do you fix a woman's watch?

You don't. There's a clock on the oven.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?

The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.

It's called wedding cake.

Why do men die before their wives?

Because they want to.

Women will never be equal to men, until they walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they're sexy.

_____________________________________________________

Still tryin' to Get Fit

2010-01-31T19:38:00.008-06:00

Hey Rooftoppers! How's it goin'? Hopin' all is well with you and yours! I'm still workin' on my New Year's Resolution to "Get Fit". Not doin' so well, but I keep tryin'. Thought the followin' suggestions were pretty good ones. I actually came up with some of these on my own...

1. Make a batch of slim soup filled with all the veggies that you love and tons of beans, making it a chicken broth or beef broth base, dependin' of course on the kind of meat you put in it. Have a cup or a bowl of this soup before supper and it will calm your appetite and you won't eat so much. This really works for me.

2. I have fallin' in love with those tiny iddy biddy oranges called Clementines! I snack on 'em at work. They're so easy, just peel and eat, and they taste amazin'! If you haven't tried 'em yet, you just gotta!

3. Eat an apple everyday. I opt for the small Gala apples, and I don't like to just grab 'em and eat, prefer to cut them in wedges, removing all the core and ick stuff. I know this guy who eats the entire apple, core and all! That is weird to me, but whatever.

4. Try findin' substitutes for fattening foods. I have no problem drinkin' or cookin' with skim milk or with sugar substitutes. BUT, there's one thing I won't substitute, ever. That thing is Hellman's mayonaise! Don't even try to take my Hellman's away from me, you might loose a hand! Hellman's makes the world go round for me. Don't dare mess with it in anyway, it can NOT be substituted, just eat less of it.

And now if you'll all look under your chair, you will find that everyone is receivin' their very own jar of Hellman's! Yea! Yippee! Whoopdee! That's what Oprah would have said. She gives away stuff, I don't.

5. This suggestion right here is the very best suggestion I can give you to Get Fit. Just watch "The Biggest Loser" and imagine yourself as a contestant. OMGosh! I think about myself up there on the scale with millions of people watchin', and I'm in a pair of spandex shorts and a sports bra! Oh the humanity!!

Sure hope y'all come back and visit me,

and if you do, add a comment.

I'd love to hear from you...

me & Ms A would love to hear from you.

______________________________________

Uses for a Penny

2010-01-23T18:00:00.004-06:00

Uses for a Penny...

I had no idea that pennies could be used for so many things. Found these uses, which were thought up by a feller named John Lawton. They were posted on Yahoo.

1. Curtain Straightener - Make an opening in the bottom hem, slide in a penny or two, and sow the hem back up to keep curtains hanging level and straight.

2. Thread Checker - Insert a penny into the groove of a tire with Lincoln's head pointing into the tire. if the groove covers part of his head, you're safe to drive; if the head is in full view, it's time for new wheels.

3. Table Anchor - If you dine out and the table is unsteady, put a coin under the leg to restore balance.

4. Makeshift Screwdriver - Use a penny to screw open a toy's battery pack.

5. Birdbath Cleaner - To ward off algae, toss in a few pre-1982 coins; the high copper content retards growth,

Those are very good uses for a penny. Here's some from me, I'm Ida, and I know stuff:

1. When you're playing football with your brothers, the game is tied and it's starts a rain pourin', flip a coin to see who the winner was.

2. I used to have a pair of penny-loafers and I would put a penny in 'em. Somebody needs to research how and why this fad began.

3. Find a penny, pick it up, all the day you'll have good luck - everybody knows that one, huh?

4. If everyone in the World was to save a penny for each day that they lived and we put all them pennies side-by-side, that line of pennies would reach to the moon and back 4,132 times. [I don't know that for sure, I just made it up. Sounds official, don't it?]

Rooftoppers? Can you think of any more uses for a penny? Well of course ya can, but you won't send your ideas in, cause ya never do, so don't even think about sendin' any of those ideas in, cause I don't wanna hear 'em. They say, "A penny for your thoughts"... well that's pretty much what my thoughts are worth these days.

________________________________________

Things your burglar won't tell you

2010-01-19T14:46:00.005-06:00

THINGS YOUR BURGLAR WON'T TELL YOU...

1. Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning your carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator.

2. Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in your yard last week. While I was in there, I unlatched the back window to make my return a little easier.

3. Love those flowers. That tells me you have taste... And taste means there are nice things inside. Those yard toys your kids leave out always make me wonder what type of gaming system they have.

4. Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up on the driveway. And I might leave a pizza flyer in your front door to see how long it takes you to remove it.

5. If it snows while you're out of town, get a neighbor to create car and foot tracks into the house. Virgin drifts in the driveway are a dead giveaway.

6. If decorative glass is part of your front entrance, don't let your alarm company install the control pad where I can see if it's set. That makes it too easy.

7. A good security company alarms the window over the sink. And the windows on the second floor, which often access the master bedroom-and your jewelry. It's not a bad idea to put motion detectors up there too.

8. It's raining, you're fumbling with your umbrella, and you forget to lock your door-understandable. But understand this: I don't take a day off because of bad weather.

9. I always knock first. If you answer, I'll ask for directions somewhere or offer to clean your gutters. (Don't take me up on it.)

10. Do you really think I won't look in your sock drawer? I always check dresser drawers, the bedside table, and the medicine cabinet.

11. Here's a helpful hint: I almost never go into kids' rooms.

12. You're right: I won't have enough time to break into that safe where you keep your valuables. But if it's not bolted down, I'll take it with me.

13. A loud TV or radio can be a better deterrent than the best alarm system. If you're reluctant to leave your TV on while you're out of town, you can buy a $35 device that works on a timer and simulates the flickering glow of a real television.

[Thank you Dardon Ann Hayter for sending these helpful ideas in!]

CAN YOU THINK OF ANY MORE GOOD IDEAS TO KEEP BURGLAR'S AWAY??

________________________________________________

Joe's Crab Shack

2010-01-15T15:31:00.004-06:00

Oh good lord! Have any of you seen the "Joe's Crab Shack" commercial? There's a family of 5, Dad, Mom, teenager, a younger child, and then maybe a 5 year old. Joe is wantin' us all to go eat at his place, so we can have a good visit with each other, while the Dad flips somethin' off his plate and everyone in the family says, "Oh s!!t!" and covers their mouth. Now of course we don't hear the family say the complete word s!!t, but we do here them say the "sh" sound. Even the little girl is sayin' the word! Now please understand Rooftoppers, I'm not a perfect person, and my mouth does come out with some naughty things from time to time, but havin' children say curse words on TV advertising a fun day at Joe's with the family is wrong. Now that's Ida's opinion... do you have one? None of ya have to agree with me, everyone is entitled to think what they want... let's hear it.

_______________________________________________________

I'd rather freeze than have a nose bleed

2010-01-05T12:14:00.010-06:00

Hey Rooftoppers, is it cold outside or what?! It was 51 degrees in my house this morning! Brrrr. I rarely turn on my heater, cause I hate breathin' in that hot, stuffy air that comes out of it, dries out my nose, makes it bleed sometimes. I'd rather freeze than have my nose bleed, wouldn't you?

I love me some cold weather! Love to sleep under 3 quilts, like I did last night. Did ya know you don't need to be sleepin' with somebody to snuggle or stay warm? It's true, you just snuggle with yourself, under a bunch of quilts.... well, quilts and my stuffed beagle, named Puppy. Isn't that a cute name for a puppy? I think it's perfect, don't you?

Another thing that can keep you warm is a steamin' bowl of soup. You thought I was gonna say Wolf Brand Chili, didn't ya? Well, that would be good too. But I found a low-cal taco soup on the internet, and it's pretty dang good, you might try it sometime....

TACO SOUP
1 lg onion, chopped

1 lg chicken breast or 1 lb lean hamburger

1 pkg taco seasoning
2 cups whole kernel corn
1 can fat-free chicken broth
1 can Bush pinto beans, undrained
1 can great northern beans, undrained
1 can fat-free refried beans
1 can diced tomatoes
1 can Ro-Tel

Saute the onion until soft. Add the other ingredients to pot. Simmer for 1 hour.

HAPPY 2010 Y'ALL!

__________________________________________________

The New Year

2009-12-29T09:35:00.008-06:00

2010 is almost here! How many of you are resolutin' on losin' weight again this year? Ha, me too! This year, I wanna "Get Fit". Been doin' some research... lookin' for good ideas to help. Here's what I've found so far. There are 2 focus areas, the Healthy Stuff Focus Area and the Unhealthy Stuff Focus Area.

Healthy Stuff
believing you can do it
working on one-day-at-a-time
making short-term weight loss goals
having a reward system
keeping a food journal
experimenting with lower calorie recipes
eating fruits
vegetables
whole grains
lean protein
plant-based fats
low-fat dairy/calcium sources
exercising
when you fail, you keep trying

Unhealthy Stuff
not planning your meals
skipping meals
emotional eating
drinking sweetened beverages
eating refined grains
saturated/trans fat
sweets
sodium
not exercising
when you fail, you give up

Here's some helpful ideas to practice:
1. Add veggies - spinach, onions, broccoli, mushrooms, tomatoes - to your scrambled eggs.
2. Serve broth-based veggie soups as an appetizer, and add snow peas, onions, broccoli florets.
3. Cut your rice or pasta portion in half and replace the starch with asparagus, zucchini, etc.
4. Use romaine leaves as wraps, with chicken or tuna inside.
5. Before dinner, serve a salad with tons of veggies added, such as carrots, grape tomatoes and string beans.

FACTOID: Jumbo food packages prompt you to eat more. In one study, adults give one pound M&M bags scarfed down 264 more calories than those given half-pound bags!
FACTOID: A chocolate chip cookie at Starbucks has 540 calories, 10 more calories than a McDonald's Quarter Pounder with Cheese! Holy canolees!!

"I keep trying to lose weight but it keeps finding me!"

"Most people lose weight by having intimate dinners for two... alone."

If you have any helpful ideas for gettin' fit,

such as ways to think positive, yummy recipes,

or fun exercises, please send 'em in!

Can't wait to hear for all of you!! LOVE Y'ALL!!

b b b b b b b b b b b

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

2009-12-21T08:43:00.007-06:00

Merry Christmas Y'all!

PECAN SQUARES COOKIES:
CRUST:2 cups all-purpose flour 1/3 cup sugar3/4 cup butter or margarine, softened1/4 teaspoon salt
FILLING:4 eggs, lightly beaten1 1/2 cups light or dark corn syrup1 1/2 cups sugar3 tablespoons butter or margarine, melted1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract2 1/2 cups chopped pecansIn a large mixing bowl, blend together flour, sugar, butter and salt until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Press firmly and evenly into a greased 15-in. x 10-in. x 1-in baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees F for 20 minutes. Meanwhile, in another bowl, combine first five filling ingredients. Stir in pecans. Spread evenly over hot crust. Bake at 350 degrees F for 25-30 minutes or until set. Cool on a wire rack.

CHRISTMAS DECOR:
The time is coming fast, so you don't have forever to come up with decorating ideas. Here's a quick & simple one for ya...
Get yourself a plate, put a large candy cane candle into a vase and place the vace on the plate. Then, encircle the rim of the vase with real candy canes that your guests can eat! Like I said, quick & easy!

A good time is coming, I wish it were here,

The very best time in the whole of the year;

I'm counting each day on my fingers and thumbs-

The weeks that must pass before Santa Claus comes.

Then when the first snowflakes begin to come down,

And the wind whistles sharp and the branches are brown,

I'll not mind the cold, though my fingers it numbs,

For it brings the time nearer when Santa Claus comes.

~Author Unknown~

2009-12-15T13:45:00.003-06:00

Idea's on how to pick the best Christmas tree...

>To select a fresh tree, gently hold a branch between your thumb and forefinger and pull it toward you. Very few needles should come off in your hand if the tree is fresh. Or shake or bounce the tree on its stump. You should not see a lot of green needles fall to the ground, though interior brown ones probably will.
>If you won't be decorating the tree right away, put it in a bucket of water on the north side of the house.
>When you're ready to bring it in and decorate it, cut an inch off the trunk and immediately put the tree in water in the tree stand. Never let it be out of water after this point.
>Keep it in as cool a spot as possible in the house. Avoid areas near fireplaces, wood-burning stoves, heat ducts and television sets.
>Make sure the tree stand's reservoir stays filled with water. If it does lose enough water that the bottom of the trunk is exposed, the trunk will need to be recut.

[Adding aspirins, copper pennies, soda pop, sugar and bleach to the water have not been shown to prolong the life of a tree.]

BLONDE JOKE: There were two blondes who went deep into the frozen woods searching for a Christmas tree. After hours of subzero temperatures a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I'm chopping down the next tree I see. I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"

A CHRISTMAS QUOTE: There's nothing sadder in the world than to wake up Christmas morning and not be a kid. -- Erma Bomback --

Christmas is on it's way

2009-11-28T10:26:00.008-06:00

Well my sweet Rooftoppers, Christmas is on its way. Seems the older I get, the faster Christmas comes around. Throughout the month of December, I'll have some decoratin' ideas, recipes, funny jokes and Merry Christmas wishes for all of our readers.

Firstly, let me start by sayin', to everyone who is readin' my words... I love you. I appreciate you takin' the time to read my blog and for readin' Big Al's blogs and for readin' Mark's articles. This time a year makes me a nicer person, think it makes us all nicer. To me, that's the best thing about these end of the year Holidays, it makes most of us kinder to our fellow man/woman/teenager/kid.

How to make a BUTTON WREATH:

Materials needed: assorted buttons, cardboard, metallic gold spray paint, multi purpose cement glue

Instructions:
1. Cut approximately 3 1/2" inch diameter circle from cardboard.
2. Spray paint the front and back of cardboard circle gold.
3. Use cement glue to arrange buttons on the cardboard making sure to cover cardboard edges. Arrange larger plain button on the bottom and place unique, colored buttons on top.
4. Once glue has dried, display on a small plate stand or attach ribbon and use as an ormanment or decoration.
TIP: Have lots of different colored buttons? Use metallic gold spray paint to spray paint them for this project.

DID YOU KNOW?

*In Denmark, they put hot porridge outside for the pixies on Christmas Eve.

*The first gingerbread man is credited to the court of Queen Elizabeth I, who favored important visitors with charming gingerbread likenesses of themselves.

TOP TEN UNSAFE TOYS FOR CHRISTMAS
10. The Junior Electrician Outlet Panel

9. Hasbro's Slippery Steps

8. Black & Decker Silly Driller

7. Roof Hanger Paratrooper Outfit

6. Remco's Pocket Hive

5. Traffic Tag

4. Will It Burn? From Parker Brothers

3. Chimney Explorer

2. My First Ferret Farm

1. Ooh - You're Blue!, the Hold-Your-Breath Game

[from David Letterman's Tonight Show]

THANKSGIVING LAUGHS

2009-11-23T16:13:00.004-06:00

What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?

Turkey feathers

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?

The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?

Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?

You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?

The outside

Why did they let the turkey join the band?

Because he had the drumsticks

Why did the police arrest the turkey?

They suspected it of fowl play

HEY YOU ROOFTOPPERS! TELL US WHAT YOU'RE THANKFUL FOR!

NOVEMBER - Turkey Balloon

2009-11-12T12:25:00.002-06:00

What a beautiful month November is. Believe it’s my favorite month of the year. Just crazy about the leaves turnin’ bright, beautiful colors, I love wearin’ my comfy, warm jam-ees at night, eatin’ till I’m sick at Thanksgiving, and also excited about Christmas bein’ on its way. Yelp, November is my favorite.

Thought I’d post directions on how to make yourself a genuine balloon turkey! I found this on the internet, thought it’s either the cutest thing ever, or as stupid as it looks… I couldn’t decide. You be the judge.

You’ll need:
2 round red balloons
1 oblong yellow balloon
Scissors and cardboard
Masking tape
Acrylic paint and brushes
Instructions:
1. Blow up a red balloon and knot off the end to form the turkey’s body.
2. To make the head, blow up the yellow balloon about halfway so that there’s an uninflated “nose” at one end, then knot off the balloon. Tie an uninflated red balloon to the nose to make the turkey’s wattle.
3. Attach the knotted-off ends of the body and the head together by wrapping a rubber band around them.
4. Cut the feet out of one piece of cardboard and attach them to the bottom of the turkey with masking tape. Now dress your bird, painting on a face and feathers.
5. You could make several of these balloon turkey birds and see who can keep theirs off the floor the longest.

If you have ideas or recipes for Thanksgiving, be they cute or stupid, please send ‘em in… OKZ?

====================================================

I'm a bit shook up...

2009-11-09T21:53:00.006-06:00

I'm sorry, but I'm a wee bit upset this evening, and I'm not gonna feel better about it until I get what's botherin' me off my chest. You see, I was sittin' watchin' TV this evenin', it was around about 8:00pm or so and pitch black outside. Suddenly here comes a heavy knock on my door. Of course I jumped, cause I sure wasn't expectin' it, and I'm a jumpy person anyway.

I muted the TV and asked, "Who's there?" And I heard a man's mumbled voice, but didn't understand what he said. I said louder, "I didn't here you. Who's there?" And he said, "I'd like to talk to you about your light bill."

Can you imagine... can you just imagine someone comin' to your house late at night, knocking on your door and expectin' you to open it? Oh my word! I almost called the police! No sane person in this age would go door to door late in the evening trying to sell somethin', would they? Well, unless he was a poor, hardworkin' man who needed money really badly, and this was the only way he could make it, but for heavens sake, what a crazy way to make money!

After he said he wanted to talk to me about my light bill I said very loudly with determined indignation, "NO, I DON'T THINK SO!" Then he yelled back at me, "OKAY!" and walked away from my house.

I turned the lights on outside and immediately called my friend Kathy from down the street to ask if she saw the man, and she said yes she did and that he was talkin' to one of the neighbors about his light bill. Well thank the lord for my friend Kathy, cause if she had said no she didn't see the guy, then I was gonna call the police and there was gonna be heck to pay, maybe, I don't know.

I'm sorry dears, that your Ida doesn't have a blog this time about how to make somethin' good to eat or some funny little sayings and such. This incident really shook me up tonight, and I just wanted to remind all you Rooftoppers out there to be careful. Watch out for yourselves, and for your families, and don't ever open the door for anyone you don't know. And you be sure and get to know your neighbors and get their phone numbers and put 'em in your phone. We need to all watch out for each other.

I'm a bit shook up about the whole thing, and just your listenin' to me has helped to calm me down some. Sure hope I can sleep. I should probably get myself a dog, I'm thinkin'.

Until next time, under more calm and pleasant circumstances... OKZ.

_____________________________________________

Thank You Cora Beth

2009-11-05T13:31:00.002-06:00

Did any of you try my chili? After I blogged it, I had to fix a batch of it for myself... it lasts for a good 5 meals. Mmmmmm, I just love it!

I know all of you Rooftoppers are as fond of Cora Beth ("Pink Legs") as I am... she's a hoot & a half! Just love it when she forwards funny little sayings, she sure keeps me laughin'! Thought I'd publish some of 'em now. Get ready to chuckle!!!!!!!

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

6. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

7. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

8. Bad decisions make good stories.

9. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

10. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

11. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

12. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

13. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

14. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the heck do I respond to that?

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

HILARIOUS!!!

THANK YOU CB!

+++++++++++++++++++++

It's November!

2009-11-02T20:18:00.012-06:00

Well how about that Halloween, did y'all have fun? Was there a party? Did y'all invite me? The answer to that last one is "no". I sat at home and ate lightly salted cashews while watchin' "Eden Log", one of the worst movies ever made in the history of movie makin'! Oh my word, I kept waitin' for it to get better, but it didn't. At the beginnin' of it, there was 30 minutes of a light flashin' on and off and on and off, whilst this idiot was slowly pullin' himself out of the mud! I thought I was gonna lose my eyesight... and my mine along with it. And yes, I know Mr. Big Al, I don't have much mind to loose. Ha. Ha.

It's November! Yelp, and it's gettin' chilly. I love chilly... and I love chili... love it even when it's hot outside. I'd like to start November off with givin' all you 3 faithful readers out there a wonderful present. I'm gonna tell ya how to make my great tasting, heart warmin' Ida's Chili! I know, I know. I'm excited too! Here goes:

olive oil for sautein'

1 green bell pepper, chopped

1 onion, chopped

1 chicken breast, cooked and shredded

1 can of Bush Chili Mix

1 can of Bush Pinto Beans

1 can of Campbell's Tomato Soup

1 can of Ro-Tel

Heat olive oil, add bell pepper and onion and saute. Then add your shredded chicken and all the other things on the list and simmer for awhile.

You can Pour Ida's Chile over Fritos or crumbled up crackers, roll it up in a torilla, spoon a bowl full of it and sprinkle shredded cheddar cheese and chopped green onions, break up some cornbread in it. It's delicious. I know for a fact though that Mr. Mark Hayter won't be havin' any of it, cause he's a fancy pantz boy who can't eat hot food. So he should just leave out the Ro-Tel and maybe add a can of chopped tomatoes instead. What a wuss.

Just thought I'd start you all off on a good foot

this November with somethin' great to eat.

If you've got a better chili recipe,

I'd like to hear about it.

Send in them recipes NOW... OKZ.

__________________________________________________________

HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

2009-10-30T08:10:00.006-05:00

"I love Halloween.

It's the only time I can be myself."

Y'all have a safe and Happy Halloween!

When you approach a house, yell "Trick or Treat!"

and after they give you candy,

don't forget to say "Thank You!"

You know Ida loves you ALL... OKZ.

HERE'S MORE HALLOWEEN IDEAS FROM IDA...

2009-10-26T21:37:00.009-05:00

MORE HALLOWEEN STUFF.........

How to make a Styrofoam Spider -- Take a large styrofoam ball – paint it black. Let it dry. Once dry, glue two googly eyes on it. Stick black pipe cleaners into the styrofoam for the legs, and bend 'em like spider legs. Make lots of 'em and hang 'em from the ceilin' or outside from a tree!

What is a spiders favorite TV show? The newly web game!

What did the spider order at McDonald's? A Big Mac and flies.

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? Because it had no guts.

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately. Ha! Ha! Ha! Hee! Hee!

Decorate Tables: Place a white tablecloth on tables and spinkle with Halloween confetti, which can be bought a the craft store (tiny cats, pumpkins, ghosts, etc.)

Shower Curtain: Buy a white shower curtain, and paint an elderly woman's figure (shadowed), with her holding a knife in her hand (as shown), for a psycho effect in the restroom!

Tin Can Luminarias: Save your veggie tin cans, clean 'em well, poke holes of pumpkins or bats or ghosts. Paint the inside of the can a light color and paint the outside of the can the color according to the picture punched (example: pumpkin = paint orange). Make holes in side of can to place a wire hanger. Then put a voltive in the can and hang from a branch which you have securely place in a heavy pot. Light the candles, it's a beautiful effect!!

What are you goin' to be for Halloween?

Are you goin' to a big party?

Tell Ida all about it... OKZ?

________________________________

HALLOWEEN PARTY IDEAS!!

2009-10-20T14:32:00.021-05:00

If you're plannin'

a Halloween Party

this year,

I've got some FUN ideas for you...

Halloween Surprise Tubes
Items needed:
Toilet paper roll tubes (If you're gonna do this, you'd better start savin' them toilet paper tubes NOW!)
Halloween wrapping paper
Tape or glue
Ribbon in Halloween colors
Small candies, small novelty items, confetti
These are real easy to make! First, measure and cut your paper so that it wraps around the toilet paper tube (with a little extra for gluing/taping) and that the length extends about 2" from each end. Glue the paper to the tube and tie one end closed with some ribbon. Fill the tube with candy; novelty items such as spider or ghost rings, stickers, etc.; and add some confetti to the mix. Tie up the open end with ribbon. Using scissors, fringe the ends and you're done. If you like, you could stick labels on each tube that are personalized with each child's name. Cool, huh?!!

A Fun Idea -- Crack open a walnut shell carefully without crackin' the shell. Clean out the nut meat from the shell. Write funny fortunes, happy thoughts or good wishes on strips of paper, then enclose the fortune in the shell. This is also coo, huh?!!

FUN GAMES:
Mask Making Contest – Set up a large workin' space with scissors, construction paper, glue, tape, colors, markers, cotton balls, stickers, and give each player a large paper sack. Give them a time limit to make the best Halloween mask. Have 'em put the masks over their heads, and give the winner a prize! Eventually, let 'em take the masks off, cause it'll get hot in there.

Pass The Pumpkin -- Have people sit in a circle and pass a small pumpkin around, while scary music is playin'. When the music stops, the person with the pumpkin is out. Continue until there's only one person left, and give the winner a prize!

Build A Scarecrow -- Form groups and have a variety of old clothes, pillowcases for heads, markers and newspaper. Groups have 20 minutes to create. Give prizes to the scariest or funniest.

Other Games:
Bobbing for apples!
Pin the tail on the black cat!
Pin a face on a pumpkin while blindfolded, to make a Jack-O-Lantern!

JOKES:
Headline: "Due to strike, grave-digging at cemetery will be done by skeleton crews". Ha! Ha! Hee!

Bloodshed - where the Red Cross keeps the plasma. Hardy Har Har!

One dark night two men were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.
Tremblin' with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones."Holy cow, Mister," one of 'em said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death we thought you was a ghost! What are you doin' workin' here so late at night?""Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!" [Now THAT is SCARY!]

Do you have any cool, funny, scary ideas

for a Halloween Party?

Send 'em to Ida... OKZ!!

_______________________________________

VAMPIRES!!!!!

2009-10-16T16:33:00.006-05:00

Rooftoppers, I found some really scary stuff about vampires. You need to read this in case you might be a vampire or maybe a vampire might be tryin' to get at you. I got this here stuff off the Internet, so you know it's gotta be true...

Identifying vampires -- Many elaborate rituals were used to identify a vampire. One method of finding a vampire's grave involved leading a virgin boy through a graveyard or church grounds on a virgin stallion, the horse would supposedly balk at the grave in question. Generally a black horse was required, though in Albania it should be white. Holes appearing in the earth over a grave were taken as a sign of vampirism. Corpses thought to be vampires were generally described as having a healthier appearance than expected, plump and showing little or no signs of decomposition. In some cases, when suspected graves were opened, villagers even described the corpse as having fresh blood from a victim all over its face. Evidence that a vampire was active in a given locality included death of cattle, sheep, relatives or neighbours. Folkloric vampires could also make their presence felt by engaging in minor poltergeist-like activity, such as hurling stones on roofs or moving household objects, and pressing on people in their sleep.

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?
A stake sandwich

What does a vampire fear most?
Tooth decay

What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It's a pain in the neck.

How can you tell when Dracula has a cold?
When he starts coffin.

What type of dogs do vampires like best?
Bloodhounds

Methods of destroying vampires -- with staking the most commonly cited method, particularly in southern Slavic cultures. Ash was the preferred wood in Russia and the Baltic states, or hawthorn in Serbia, with a record of oak in Silesia. Potential vampires were most often staked through the heart, though the mouth was targeted in Russia and northern Germany and the stomach in north-eastern Serbia. Piercing the skin of the chest was a way of "deflating" the bloated vampire; this is similar to the act of burying sharp objects, such as sickles, in with the corpse, so that they may penetrate the skin if the body bloats sufficiently while transforming into a revenant. Decapitation was the preferred method in German and western Salvic areas, with the head buried between the feet, behind the buttocks or away from the body. This act was seen as a way of hastening the departure of the soul, which in some cultures, was said to linger in the corpse. The vampire's head, body, or clothes could also be spiked and pinned to the earth to prevent rising. Gypsies drove steel or iron needles into a corpse's heart and placed bits of steel in the mouth, over the eyes, ears and between the fingers at the time of burial. They also placed hawthorn in the corpse's sock or drove a hawthorn stake through the legs. In a 16th-century burial near Venice, a brick forced into the mouth of a female corpse has been interpreted as a vampire-slaying ritual by the archaeologists who discovered it in 2006. Further measures included pouring boiling water over the grave or complete incineration of the body. In the Balkans a vampire could also be killed by being shot or drowned, by repeating the funeral service, by sprinkling holy water on the body, or by exorcism. In Romania garlic could be placed in the mouth, and as recently as the 19th century, the precaution of shooting a bullet through the coffin was taken. For resistant cases, the body was dismembered and the pieces burned, mixed with water, and administered to family members as a cure. In Saxon regions of Germany, a lemon was placed in the mouth of suspected vampires.

Write in and tell us
what you think about vampires.

And, if you ARE a vampire,

then let us know that too, OKZ?

________________________

FUN WITH GHOSTS

2009-10-12T11:58:00.006-05:00

GHOSTS

What does a ghost get when it falls and hurts its knee?
A boo boo.

MAKING A COSTUME:

What you will need to make a Halloween costume like Charlie Brown's:
1. a white sheet
2. a pair of scissors

How to make the costume:
1. cut out circles all over the sheet, so that it looks like the picture posted
2. put the sheet over your head and wear it

What is a baby ghost's favorite game?
Peek-a-boo

The 5 most common places where

ghosts are seen:
1. looking out windows
2. on staircases
3. in hallways
4. sitting in chairs
5. in mirrors

What kind of car does a ghost drive?
A Boo-ick

SIX SIGNS OF A HAUNTING:
1. Pets react to something others can't see, such as growling in thin air, or not wanting to go into a certain room.
2. People that live in the house are having nightmares.
3. Items are mysteriously misplaced, and replaced just as mysteriously.
4. Electrical appliances turn on and off and toilets flush by themselves.
5. Unexplained cold spots and cold drafts are felt.
6. Footsteps, raps on the wall and voices are heard.

What did the mother ghost say to her son?
Don't spook unless you are spooken to.

Why did the ghost pick his nose?
Because he had boo-gers.

What kind of spirits serve food on a plane?
Airline ghostesses

Where do ghosts go swimming?
in The Dead Sea

DO YOU HAVE A GHOST STORY TO TELL US?
How about a ghost riddle or joke?

FUN WITH PUMPKINS

2009-10-08T11:11:00.005-05:00

PUMPKINS

How do you mend a broken pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch!

Carvin' pumpkin tip....After you have carved your pumpkin, wipe Vaseline along the cut edges - this will help preserve your pumpkin.

Decorate Peppers....For somethin' different carve green peppers as jack-o-lanterns! You can also carve red or yellow ones.

Why didn't the pumpkin cross the road?
Cause he didn't have any legs! Duh.

Tip - When pickin' a good pumpkin, select an unbruised one. Make sure the pumpkin has a flat bottom so it sits upright by itself.

Fact - The Native Americans called pumpkins "isquotersquash."

What do you get when you divide the circumferance of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi

Pumpkin Pie - The origin of pumpkin pie is thought to have occurred when the colonists sliced off the pumpkin top, removed the seeds, and then filled it with milk, spices and honey. The pumpkin was then baked in the hot ashes of a dying fire.

How big can a pumpkin get? The largest pumpkin grown in the United States in 2007 was 1689 lbs!!!

What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
Squash

The Pilgrims - Many of the early settlers might have died from starvation had it not been for pumpkins. The followin' poem is a testament to the Pilgrims dependence upon pumpkins for food:
"For pottage and puddings and custards and pies

Our pumpkins and parsnips are common supplies,

We have pumpkins at morning and pumpkins at noon,

If it were not for pumpkins we should be undoon."
[Pilgrim verse, circa 1633]

Undoon? They sure had a funny way of speakin' back then... at least it rhymes with noon.

Pumpkin Capital - Did you know that the "pumpkin capital" of the world is Morton, Illinois? This self-proclaimed pumpkin capital is where you'll find the home of the Libby corporation's pumpkin industry.

Native Americans - Flattened strips of pumpkins, dried them and made mats. Pumpkins were formerly considered a remedy for freckles and snakebites.

What do you call an obnoxious pumpkin?
A jerk-o-lantern

Hey Rooftoppers!
Can you come up with any other important things
that we need to know about pumpkins?

How to Make Tombstones for Halloween

2009-10-05T09:16:00.003-05:00

This is such an easy way to decorate your yard for Halloween, if ya do that kind of thing. Ya get some thick syrafoam and cut a tombstone shape out of it. Use a knife for the cuttin', you'll hate the sound, I do. Then, write names on the styrafoam with painters tape. Spray the syrafoam with gray spray paint, sprayin' as many coats as needed. After the paint has dried, pull the tape off and there you have your tombstone with a name on it. Shove some sticks up the bottom of the marker and plant that sucker in the ground. How easy is that?!

I found some really cool names you can put on the tombstones. Some of 'em made me laugh out loud!!

Anita Hart
Myra Mains
Ben Better
Eileen Dover Clift
Ben Dover
Izzy Stillalive
Roman D. Earth
Justin Pieces
Frank N. Beans
Anita Manda Cook
Bill M. Lader
Will Knott Rest
Helen Back

And entire family of Rott's:
Fester N. Rott
Diane Rott
Willy Rott

Can you think of other funny tombstone names?

Send 'em in to Rooftop!!

Uses for Rubber Bands

2009-10-01T23:59:00.000-05:00

You know how people send Ms Heloise hints

on how to use things? Well, I thought I'd give

you a few ways you can use RUBBER BANDS,

and then you rooftoppers can send in your own

thoughts on what to do with 'em...

now let's keep this clean, OKZ.

1. Use them to open jars -- Wrap a rubber band several times around the lid of a jar and it will give you somethin' to grip to make openin' easier.

2. Use 'em for decoratin' Easter eggs -- put bands around a hard-boiled egg and place it in food colorin'. Remove the egg, let the egg dry, then remove the bands and you got some cool white lines around your egg. Now isn't that fun?!

3. A friend told me this one... thether stemware and other delicate, wobbly items to the rack of your dishwasher so they won't get cracked. I didn't know about this idea, 'cause the only dishwasher I have, is Me!

4. Here's a neat one, use several big multicolored rubber bands to wrap a present. This is great when you don't have any scotch tape, and it's different too... when have you seen a present wrapped with rubberbands... uh-huh, me neither. Now if you was to wrap the present with newspaper and rubber bands, then people would think you're "Green", and remember how I told you that in this day & time, being "Green" means people think you're real smart when you might not be.

5. We've all heard of this one, but I could never do it, cause it's just tortureous! If you're a smoker, wear a band around your wrist and ever time you crave a smoke snap yourself with the rubber band. Ouch! That's just mean. That would be like when I was a kid, and we'd run outta the house lettin' the back door slam, we'd get our hair yanked for it! The door would slam, and we'd stop dead in our tracks, and here would come Mom out on the porch to give our hair a tug. I'm not a big fan of pain bein' used to learn stuff. It didn't make me learn nothin', it just pissed me off.

Okay, those are the ideas for using rubber bands that I found,

now you send in your ideas and comments.

No matter how lame your idea might be,

I respect all comers.

Now think... what would you do with a rubber band? Hmmm?

HOW TO: BE HAPPY WITH LESS

2009-09-27T22:07:00.009-05:00

Now I'm not gonna tell ya that money can't buy happiness, but I will tell ya that you can be just as happy with a lot less than ya have? Huh? Let me explain...

Step 1: Assume that your life is as good as it's ever gonna get.
Assume you'll never be richer, and you'll be a bunch closer to bein' content with what ya have, 'specially if you're not wishin' and hopin' and prayin' to get more.

Step 2: Know the truth.
Don't assume that more money would make you happier. As long as the bills are gettin' paid, there's not much difference on the happiness scale between the rich and the rest of us. Think about it.

Step 3: Make frugality fun.
In other words... Think Cheap! Figurin' out ways to save money can be as satisfyin' as spendin' it.

Step 4: Play The Glad Game

Think happy thoughts. People who thought about positive events in their lives for 8 minutes per day for 3 days felt better about their lives a month later, according to a study. And no, I don't know what study it was or who did the study or why 8 minutes and not 10... just do it!

Step 5: Focus on Doin'instead of Spendin'.

Focus on things you can DO instead of things you can BUY. Experiences bring more pleasure than possessions, and the good feelings last longer, accordin' to research... again, I don't know what research, just do it. It just seems more believable if you think someone has done research, don't it? Go for a walk, go swing on the playground, work in your garden, play with your hamster, etc.

Step 6: GO GREEN.

Ever time you refrain from buyin' somethin' that you don't need, make do with what you've got, or purchase somethin' used, think of the good you're doin' the planet. And besides, bein' Green in this day and time is very popular, and it makes people think you're smarter than you really are, trust me on this.

A wise person once said... "Embrace the sentiment that true happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you've got." And no it weren't me that said it, but it coulda been.

Outdoorsy Humor

2009-09-18T12:53:00.005-05:00

How to Clean Your Pipes

2009-09-03T14:41:00.006-05:00

Have ya seen Jamie Lee Curtis in that commercial that they show over and over again? You know the one where the one lady is tryin' to coax another lady into goin' swimmin'? And the first lady squinches up her face like she's smells somethin' unpleasant and starts rubbin' her tummy and says she can't go swimmin', with bowlegged women, no no sorry... she can't go swimmin' cause she's a bit irregular. You know that commercial of which I'm speakin'?

Well, I was a bit puzzled 'bout what they meant by irregular and all the talk about "Irregular Bowel Syndrome" (IBS as it's often referred to). Anything that ends in syndrome sounds serious to me, you too? What they're advertisin' is a product called "Activia", and you really can't just say the word, ya have to sorta sing it like they do on the TV... you know, Ac-tiv-ee-ah! I went and bought some of the stuff Monday, the strawberry flavored kind... it's a strawberry yogurt is what it is. Honestly I didn't know what they were talkin' about when they were talkin' about IBS. Well, let me tell you somethin'... I now have a pretty darn good idea of what it means now!

It tasted like any of them little yogurt cups, strawberry-like and yogurty, but what happens afterwards... well, just refer to the title of this blog. Bet you thought I was gonna help ya with your household plumbing, huh?

Ac-tiv-ee-ah!

It works... trust me. It's a good thing I live alone.

Odean, Peek & Boo

2009-08-31T22:14:00.006-05:00

Today, marks the 7 year anniversary since my Odean has left this world. He's probably sitting on the front porch of Heaven right this minute and whittlin' somethin' for the angels, maybe a sweet soundin' flute that they can play and make beautiful music with. More likely though, he's out back pitchin' horseshoes with his twin brothers Peek and Boo.

Can't say I'm all that sad on this memorable day, cause my Odean left me with so many reminders of himself, it's like he never left, really. What I mean by reminders is... he taught me ever thing I know, from makin' turkey jerkey to knittin' booties. If it weren't for Odean, I'd just be another dunderheaded old woman, who couldn't do nothin'! But nope, after my man passed, I decided to help his legacy to live on. I decided to show people all over the world the things that they can do all by themselves.

You've read some of the things I can do in my bloggin' here, things that I taught you and now you can teach yourns. Okay, I must admit, that's makin' me a little bit teary eyed knowin' that I can be of help to you... makes me feel important and useful.

Alright, enough of that mauldin' stuff, now let's get down to business. I got a project for you to work on. Did you know that you can make your own placemats? I know, I know, it sounds undoable, but you can, it's a breeze. Now listenin'... gather up your greeting cards that people have sent you through the years, pick out the purdiest ones, cut the front pictures from them, and paste 'em to a piece of poster board. After you've covered the poster board, take some of that blue painters tape that everbody's usin', and make outlines around each picture with the tape. Then, get yourself a permanent marker and write your name on the mat. Or you can make a big blob of placemats and give 'em to your cousins and nieces and nephews for Christmas, and write their names on 'em.

Now I know it's just September, but if you get to workin' on the mats now, you won't be all rushed to finish them come Christmas time. And like Odean always told me, "Get goin' on it now Ida, ya know how you get all loopy when you start sniffin' them markers!" That man was always lookin' out for me. Ever time I sniff a permanent marker I think of my Odean... and sometimes I can see little pink elephants a circlin' my head while they're dancin'... I also might see Peek & Boo a pitchin' horseshoes, they didn't know much how to do anything else.

If you have an idea for a homemade Christmas gift,

just blog it to me.

Odean would be proud of ya.

How to Throw a Great Party!

2009-08-24T09:56:00.006-05:00

I know many of you suffer with throwin' fun Birthday parties, so I'm here to tell ya how it's done the fun way, because, like they all say... Ida knows stuff... that's me, I'm Ida.

First off, tell your friends and family that you're going to meet at a restaurant where no one has ever been before - find a new place. Tell 'em a time, say... 5:00 pm, and of course tell 'em where the restaurant is, that's just bein' helpful, nobody will want to drive all over town trying to guess where it's being held. A Chinese Buffet is a very cool place to dine if you have a big bunch of people, say 15 of 'em. The staff at the restaurant will probably sit y'all as close together as possible. Then everybody goes off and gets whatever food they want, and they eat until they can't eat any more, and then they complain about how much they et... that's always a fun part of a party.

A Chinese buffet is a good choice cause it's a relaxed atmosphere, people are millin' around ever where and you can go and talk to your friends/family anytime you want, and you can all change seats if you want to, it's a real blast! Somethin' I like to do is to walk over to one of the tables and pretend that I'm the manager and ask 'em how their food was and are they havin' a good time. Oh, and it's a real hoot if you tell that group, that someone has taken care of their tab. When this group starts to walk out the door without payin', just stand back and enjoy the fun!

After eating a delicious meal and having great supper conversation, ask everbody to your home for lemon cake with white "whipped icing" -- make 3 layers, not your usual 2. Sprinkle yellow sugar crystals on top and stick tall "sparkle" candles in the cake... it will look very dramatic, everybody will love it! One person, maybe a very sweet niece (one of your favorites, possibly), will tell ya that it was the best cake she has ever eaten and that lemon cake is her favorite. Trust me, it could happen... you never know, but I do... member... Ida knows stuff.

Now after supper and after cake, all the older people will sit around the room a moanin' and complainin' about how much they et, and also where they hurt... you know how old people can be. The rest of the group will huddle up with the little ones to play really fun party games like "Colored Eggs" and "Duck, Duck, Goose". It will be hilarious!! Of course, fun proof the room, that's very important, you don't want your good stuff broken. Oh, and there could possibly be an adorable little blonde headed boy at your party, we'll call 'im say, J Bear, and he'll be saying silly things out loud that will make everybody laugh real hard and make his parents turn all shades of red, like... "You eat poopoo." or "You're a poopoo face." Everyone will be rollin' with laughter, well everyone 'cept the couple that left early because 7:00pm is past their bedtime, and they can't be out after dark, so they're missin' all the fun.

Now you trust me on this, it will be the funnest party ever! And all you have to do is to bake the best tasting cake that your beautiful niece has ever eaten.

Do all this, and your Birthday Party cannot fail, trust me... I know stuff.

Now tell me about the funest Birthday Party you've ever been too.

Sometimes Readin' TV Is Better Than Hearin' It

2009-08-17T21:55:00.008-05:00

Oh good lord, what a time I've been havin'! My computer's been on the fritz since we had that terrible thunderstorm on July 23rd! It's workin' now, but I missed it so very much.

And believe it or don't, the sound is not happenin' on my TV! If you think readin' a book makes you sleepy, try spendin' your time watchin' "Sex and the City" reruns on TV with no sound, while readin' the words on the screen, and your eyes are a dartin' up and down and back and forth tryin' to see all the purdy clothes and the people.

I've dropped off to sleep many a time tryin' to keep up with episodes of "This Old House". I just love that Richard Trethewey, he can replace my tallet's O ring any day he wants to. Well, I can definitely do it myself, but if the big lug wants to do it for me, that's okz with me. Oh for heaven's sake! No I'm not metaforin' for anything but plumbing fixin's. Good lord, what kind of a lady do you take me for?! Now get your mind outta the gutter or wherever you keep it... you kiss your Momma with that mouth?!

The only thing, and I repeat, the only thing that is better off readin' off the TV is the Rachel Ray show. It's still not easy watchin' her flap her arms, but at least ya don't have to listen to her. She has a new program out now - unbelievable, huh?! - Rachel Ray in a new program?! I know, I know, I was just as shocked as you!! It's called "Travelin' With Rachel Ray"... pretty soon we'll be bathin' with her for heavens sake!! On this Travelin' show, she's got her husband with her and they're sittin' in a restaurant in San Antonio, Texas, and she is talkin' and talkin' and flappin' them arms all over the place, and that sweet, quiet husband of hers is just sittin' there a smilin', and ever once in awhile she'll let him say something like, "That's right." Poor fella, he don't know what he's gotten himself into. That Miss Ray is one of the most driven people I have ever seen in my life. I bet she don't even lay down when she sleeps... just hovers over her bed a babblin' like a brook.

And have you been watchin' "Big Brother"?! Oh come on, I know you have too, admit it. That Chima Simone has gotten herself kicked off the program! When I heard about it, I jumped for joyiousness! I'm tellin' ya, if a person can't behave themselves and wants to act all poopy and misbehavein', then they should be yanked off of the TV. It's high time too... I tell ya what, she was given me the fits. They kicked her butt off the show! Yippee Whoha! That there made my day! You go Big Brother!! I was so sick of her talkin' smack all the time and gettin' on people's bad sides - good riddance to bad rubbage, I always say.

Thank the lord, the cable man is coming out tomorrow to repair the no verbage problem on my TV. It will be nice to hear my TV again, maybe I'll be nappin' a little bit less by not readin' it anymore. You would not believe the number of naps I took in one day!

Oh, here's a question I wish someone could answer for me... Where did the saying "on the fritz" come from? Anybody?

I do NOT do gray.

2009-08-06T10:55:00.005-05:00

I apologize to my 4 faithful Rooftopper readers for not bein' around for a bit. My computer has been on the fritz, and boy are my arms tired!

How 'bout that Bachelorette! What did you think about it? I do believe that whatshishead was a bad choice. All the bachelorette girl had to do was to look at the guy's dad, and that shoulda answered if he was the one for her, lordy! It just goes to show ya that people are stupid all over.

There was a comment on my last blog from a Bradley Smeltz, and I've gotta tell ya son, first and foremost, do not, I must repeat it, do NOT, ever eat anything gray! Gray is not a good food color. Oysters, mushrooms, hunks in the freezer, etc. Gray food is rubbery, slimmy and boogery, and should be fed to cats, and only cats.

I hate to admit it, but that Al boy was correct... some kinda casserole would be the perfect recipe for those items that Smeltz mentioned. Let's get started shall we?

Saute the onions and the celery in a 1/4 cup a lard, chop them hot dog buns up into tiny pieces, add them to the onions and celery, cook all until they're transparent. Oh my! Can you smell that smell! As Rachel would say Mm-Mm-Mm-Mm-Mm, has a nutty kind of a smell, don't it?

In my opinion, everything has a nutty kind of smell to Rachel. Let me tell you somethin' sweetheart, if it ain't got nuts in it, then it don't smell like nuts! And what a mouth that girl has got on her.

"Rachel, darlin', could ya shut up for just once? Ya don't hafta fill every danged second of time with your stupid chatter! So you invented the garbage bowl, big deal! That don't make you no expert! Garbage bowl my aunt's patootie... it's called a garbage CAN! They've been usin' 'em for years! Get yourself one, walk over to it and throw your nutty smelling cookin' away... holy christmas, are ya that lazy?!

Now where was I? Oh yes, put the mixture in a casserole dish, place a big chunk of Velveeta on top and bake that sucker for 35 minutes in a 400 degree oven, or until the cheese all melts. Now don't tell me you ain't got no Velveeta in your cupboard, everybody has Velveeta at home somewhere.

Now Bradley, for dessert, whip the box of lemon jello together with the peanut butter, until fluffy. Fill cupcake tins with 2 Tbs each of the mixture (it makes 24). Place slices of Velveeta on top of each, and bake 35 minutes in a 400 degree oven, or until the cheese all melts.

And that hunka gray stuff in the freezer... feed it to the cat.

Bradly son, or any of my other readers, iffin' ya got questions about how to do anything, anything at all, you send them cards & letters and emails in to Rooftop and Ida will do her dangedest to help out, KZ?

WORDS FOR WOMEN TO LIVE BY

2009-07-20T22:03:00.006-05:00

Howdy Rooftoppers!

I read up on that Hints from Heloise lady and did you know that sometimes, well most a the time, people send in stuff for her column? It's true! So I thought I'd do a little bit a Heloisein' myself and post somethin' from my favorite follower and yurs, that little gal with the pink legs http://sarcasticgranny.blogspot.com/

WORDS FOR WOMEN TO LIVE BY
1. Aspire to be Barbie - the witch has everything.
2. Take life with a pinch of salt..... a wedge of lime and a shot of tequila.
3. Go on the 30 day diet. I'm on it, and so far I've lost 15 days.
4. When life gets you down, just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
5. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's okay, they know me here.
6. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
7. Don't get your knickers in a knot. It solves nothing and makes you walk funny.
8. If it has tires or testicles, it's going to give you trouble.
9. By the time a woman realizes that her Mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.
10. And my personal favorite --> Remember, wherever there is a good looking, sweet, single or married man, there is some woman tired of his bullcrap.

Oh heck, she still looks great at 60... Pa-shaw!

Y'all come back and see Ida... OKZ!

________________________________________________________

MORE IDEAS

2009-07-16T21:38:00.004-05:00

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Howdy Rooftoppers! Don't ja just love being called a ROOFTOPPER? There's just something real enjoyable about it, ya feel a part of somethin', don't ja? I can see ya sittin' up there on the house with Mark & Al... you're lookin' good up there, real good! People got their WeddingCakeToppers and their PizzaToppers and MountainToppers, and now there's ROOFTOPPERS, and that's the best kind of TOPPER to be, don't ja think?

Well, reckon that's enuff about the tops of thangs. I gotta get right down to beness now and let you in on an Idea From Ida... that's Me! I'm Ida.

Alright now, hold onto yourselves. Are you holdin'? Okay... Do you cook your own rice? I said, do you cook your own rice?! Well I do, none a that boxed stuff fur me, and I don't own one of those fancy fandangled rice makin' machines neither... don't need anything like that. Ya don't! Now just listen up to how you make the best rice you can make.

Ya get yourself a pot (that's a cookin' pot, ya idiot!), add to that pot (iffin' one more of ya makes me clarify that it's a cookin' pot again, pots are gonna be flyin'!), ight? Continuing... 1 cup a short grain rice, 1-1/2 cups a water, salt to taste, and a tablespoon of vinegar. Yelp, I said vinegar. Why? Well because a little vinegar in your rice will make your rice prettier for one thang and real white lookin', AND when the lids on your pota rice and it's a cookin', the vinegar keeps it all from boilin' over. It's like a cookin' miracle! I promise you, put a bit a vinegar in yer rice and it will NOT boil over on ya, it won't!

Bring the rice to a boil, put it on simmer for 30 minutes. Do NOT... I repeat... DO NOT open the lid! After 30 minutes, leave yer rice be with the lid still on it fur another 5 minutes. THEN take the lid off and fluff it with a fork... the rice... fluff the RICE with a fork, ya dunderhead, not the lid.

Now that is some beautiful rice you'll have there. A course don't furget to make some mouth waterin' gravy to go on that rice or maybe some hot as fire chili. Mmmmmmm, good eatin', goooooood eatin'! I'm warn out now, ya wear me out. Y'all go and make a batch of it and let me know how yer rice cooked up, OKZ. I'm off to bed.

AND, don't furget to enter that contest that Al's got goin'. You could win a ROOFTOPPERS mug!! I entered the contest and I think I got the right answer. I'm real smart with contests. Oh, and yer gonna love readin' Mark's heartwarmin' article 'bout his sweet nephews. I cried. I did.

Y'all come back and see Ida, KZ?

Here's an Idea

2009-07-13T22:06:00.002-05:00

Yee-ha!! Would you Hayter Brothers lookie over there to your left! I've got 2 Followers! Now I hadn't seen 'em followin' me, but it says that they do. Anywho, they just happen to be two of my favor-right people - Cora Beth (also known as CB) & Will. By the way Will, you look much better in your picture now, you musta shaved your body and gotten that tooth removed, wow what an improvement.

Well people, I'm Ida the idea lady, and I'm gonna be comin' up with some outta this world ideas for you Rooftopers...... Oh, for heaven sakes, did you catch that?! I just come up with a brillant idea..... callin' the people who come here to the Rooftop, Rooftoppers! Ideas come springin' to my head like that all day long, and iffin' I don't write 'em down right then and there, they just spring away!

What do you Hayter boys think of that? Rooftoppers! It's brilliant, purdee genius, am I right? Huh? Well sure I am. And to think you boys are gettin' me for nothin'!

Oh, and here's another idea I come up with this mornin'..... I was fixin' to eat breakfast - a banana, yogurt and O juice, and didn't have much time to eat cause I was in a big hurry. Well, all of a sudden I get this here idea to put that banana, O juice and yogurt all together in the blender and swish it all together, and ladeeda it made this like fruity drink thing, mmmmm! Have you ever?!!! Well a course you haven't. You know, there's very few people who can come up with real smart ideas like that..... I just happened to be one of those few.

Now you be sure and save all this genius stuff, so you can share it all with your friends. And while you're with your friends, tell 'em to come on and mowzee over to the Rooftop, Mark's roof can hold way more people!

Now, tomorrow, all you ROOFTOPPERS fix yourselves a FRUITY DRINK, then I'm sure y'all WILL have a great day talkin' on your CB's! I think I just peed myself laughin'!!!

Picture Show Etiquette

2009-06-22T13:30:00.000-05:00

Howdy Rooftop Readers!

Those precious brothers, Mark & Big Al Hayter, have asked me to add some class to their website (believe you me, they needed it). They're such sweet boys (ain't neither one of 'em got the sense God gave a hyena) but they're sweet boys alright. I knew their Mamma, and trust me, she did a good job on those two.

So, here I am to add my ideas, some proper etiquette, and just whatever might be on my mind. Hold onto yourselves....

Went to the movies last Saturday, saw "The Talking of Pelham 123". Good movie, but I ain't here to plug it, really here to give a lesson in proper Picture Show Etiquette.

Listen up now... Did you know that in a movie theater it's improper to kick the seat in front of you? It's very annoyin' to the person who's gettin' 'er chair kicked, very annoyin'.

And what's worse than that, is sitting in your seat and suddenly seein' a man's big ol', smelly, scaly, fungi-ed foot in your face! I am not jokin' here! There it was a big ol' foot in a sandal propped up to the side of my chair. So not only was this old coot kickin' my chair, but he was displayin' one a his old dogs to me!! Well I never!!

Now I had ever right in this world to yank that old goat up and ring him a new one, but I didn't do that. Nope, I took the high road and just gathered my things up and moved one row down. Don't know what that jack donkey thought of that, reckon he was puzzled a bit.

I get really angry at stupid people. Am so happy I don't belong to that group. Now I ain't sayin' that I'm perfect, not by any stretch of the imagination, but I sure aint stupid enough to prop my foot up by somebody's head like smell my feet! Know what I'm sayin'? Sure you do.

The lesson here is: While in the picture show, don't kick the seat of the person in front a you, and don't let nobody ever smell your feet, lessin' they want to.

Hope y'all have learned something from my experience and my first blog on The Rooftop. Am sure I will be of much help to you and your'n in the future, so come back real soon for another Idea from Ida!

Comment if you'd like. I'd love to hear from ya! What kind a bad experiences have you had at the picture show?

Y'all have a nice week... OKZ?