Saturday, November 28, 2009

Christmas is on it's way

Well my sweet Rooftoppers, Christmas is on its way. Seems the older I get, the faster Christmas comes around. Throughout the month of December, I'll have some decoratin' ideas, recipes, funny jokes and Merry Christmas wishes for all of our readers.
Firstly, let me start by sayin', to everyone who is readin' my words... I love you. I appreciate you takin' the time to read my blog and for readin' Big Al's blogs and for readin' Mark's articles. This time a year makes me a nicer person, think it makes us all nicer. To me, that's the best thing about these end of the year Holidays, it makes most of us kinder to our fellow man/woman/teenager/kid.

How to make a BUTTON WREATH:
Materials needed: assorted buttons, cardboard, metallic gold spray paint, multi purpose cement glue

1. Cut approximately 3 1/2" inch diameter circle from cardboard.
2. Spray paint the front and back of cardboard circle gold.
3. Use cement glue to arrange buttons on the cardboard making sure to cover cardboard edges. Arrange larger plain button on the bottom and place unique, colored buttons on top.
4. Once glue has dried, display on a small plate stand or attach ribbon and use as an ormanment or decoration.
TIP: Have lots of different colored buttons? Use metallic gold spray paint to spray paint them for this project.
*In Denmark, they put hot porridge outside for the pixies on Christmas Eve.
*The first gingerbread man is credited to the court of Queen Elizabeth I, who favored important visitors with charming gingerbread likenesses of themselves.
10. The Junior Electrician Outlet Panel
9. Hasbro's Slippery Steps
8. Black & Decker Silly Driller
7. Roof Hanger Paratrooper Outfit
6. Remco's Pocket Hive
5. Traffic Tag
4. Will It Burn? From Parker Brothers
3. Chimney Explorer
2. My First Ferret Farm
1. Ooh - You're Blue!, the Hold-Your-Breath Game
[from David Letterman's Tonight Show]

Monday, November 23, 2009


What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?
Turkey feathers

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
Plymouth Rock

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play


Thursday, November 12, 2009

NOVEMBER - Turkey Balloon

What a beautiful month November is. Believe it’s my favorite month of the year. Just crazy about the leaves turnin’ bright, beautiful colors, I love wearin’ my comfy, warm jam-ees at night, eatin’ till I’m sick at Thanksgiving, and also excited about Christmas bein’ on its way. Yelp, November is my favorite.

Thought I’d post directions on how to make yourself a genuine balloon turkey! I found this on the internet, thought it’s either the cutest thing ever, or as stupid as it looks… I couldn’t decide. You be the judge.

You’ll need:
2 round red balloons
1 oblong yellow balloon
Scissors and cardboard
Masking tape
Acrylic paint and brushes
1. Blow up a red balloon and knot off the end to form the turkey’s body.
2. To make the head, blow up the yellow balloon about halfway so that there’s an uninflated “nose” at one end, then knot off the balloon. Tie an uninflated red balloon to the nose to make the turkey’s wattle.
3. Attach the knotted-off ends of the body and the head together by wrapping a rubber band around them.
4. Cut the feet out of one piece of cardboard and attach them to the bottom of the turkey with masking tape. Now dress your bird, painting on a face and feathers.
5. You could make several of these balloon turkey birds and see who can keep theirs off the floor the longest.

If you have ideas or recipes for Thanksgiving, be they cute or stupid, please send ‘em in… OKZ?


Monday, November 9, 2009

I'm a bit shook up...

I'm sorry, but I'm a wee bit upset this evening, and I'm not gonna feel better about it until I get what's botherin' me off my chest. You see, I was sittin' watchin' TV this evenin', it was around about 8:00pm or so and pitch black outside. Suddenly here comes a heavy knock on my door. Of course I jumped, cause I sure wasn't expectin' it, and I'm a jumpy person anyway.
I muted the TV and asked, "Who's there?" And I heard a man's mumbled voice, but didn't understand what he said. I said louder, "I didn't here you. Who's there?" And he said, "I'd like to talk to you about your light bill."
Can you imagine... can you just imagine someone comin' to your house late at night, knocking on your door and expectin' you to open it? Oh my word! I almost called the police! No sane person in this age would go door to door late in the evening trying to sell somethin', would they? Well, unless he was a poor, hardworkin' man who needed money really badly, and this was the only way he could make it, but for heavens sake, what a crazy way to make money!
After he said he wanted to talk to me about my light bill I said very loudly with determined indignation, "NO, I DON'T THINK SO!" Then he yelled back at me, "OKAY!" and walked away from my house.
I turned the lights on outside and immediately called my friend Kathy from down the street to ask if she saw the man, and she said yes she did and that he was talkin' to one of the neighbors about his light bill. Well thank the lord for my friend Kathy, cause if she had said no she didn't see the guy, then I was gonna call the police and there was gonna be heck to pay, maybe, I don't know.
I'm sorry dears, that your Ida doesn't have a blog this time about how to make somethin' good to eat or some funny little sayings and such. This incident really shook me up tonight, and I just wanted to remind all you Rooftoppers out there to be careful. Watch out for yourselves, and for your families, and don't ever open the door for anyone you don't know. And you be sure and get to know your neighbors and get their phone numbers and put 'em in your phone. We need to all watch out for each other.
I'm a bit shook up about the whole thing, and just your listenin' to me has helped to calm me down some. Sure hope I can sleep. I should probably get myself a dog, I'm thinkin'.

Until next time, under more calm and pleasant circumstances... OKZ.


Thursday, November 5, 2009

Thank You Cora Beth

Did any of you try my chili? After I blogged it, I had to fix a batch of it for myself... it lasts for a good 5 meals. Mmmmmm, I just love it!

I know all of you Rooftoppers are as fond of Cora Beth ("Pink Legs") as I am... she's a hoot & a half! Just love it when she forwards funny little sayings, she sure keeps me laughin'! Thought I'd publish some of 'em now. Get ready to chuckle!!!!!!!

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

6. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

7. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

8. Bad decisions make good stories.

9. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

10. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

11. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

12. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

13. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

14. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the heck do I respond to that?

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.




Monday, November 2, 2009

It's November!

Well how about that Halloween, did y'all have fun? Was there a party? Did y'all invite me? The answer to that last one is "no". I sat at home and ate lightly salted cashews while watchin' "Eden Log", one of the worst movies ever made in the history of movie makin'! Oh my word, I kept waitin' for it to get better, but it didn't. At the beginnin' of it, there was 30 minutes of a light flashin' on and off and on and off, whilst this idiot was slowly pullin' himself out of the mud! I thought I was gonna lose my eyesight... and my mine along with it. And yes, I know Mr. Big Al, I don't have much mind to loose. Ha. Ha.
It's November! Yelp, and it's gettin' chilly. I love chilly... and I love chili... love it even when it's hot outside. I'd like to start November off with givin' all you 3 faithful readers out there a wonderful present. I'm gonna tell ya how to make my great tasting, heart warmin' Ida's Chili! I know, I know. I'm excited too! Here goes:

olive oil for sautein'
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 onion, chopped
1 chicken breast, cooked and shredded
1 can of Bush Chili Mix
1 can of Bush Pinto Beans
1 can of Campbell's Tomato Soup
1 can of Ro-Tel
Heat olive oil, add bell pepper and onion and saute. Then add your shredded chicken and all the other things on the list and simmer for awhile.

You can Pour Ida's Chile over Fritos or crumbled up crackers, roll it up in a torilla, spoon a bowl full of it and sprinkle shredded cheddar cheese and chopped green onions, break up some cornbread in it. It's delicious. I know for a fact though that Mr. Mark Hayter won't be havin' any of it, cause he's a fancy pantz boy who can't eat hot food. So he should just leave out the Ro-Tel and maybe add a can of chopped tomatoes instead. What a wuss.

Just thought I'd start you all off on a good foot
this November with somethin' great to eat.
If you've got a better chili recipe,
I'd like to hear about it.

Send in them recipes NOW... OKZ.